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Fun with crime!

A forum for the off topic stuff. Everything from religion to philosophy to sex to humor (see why it used to be called Buggery?). All manner of rude psychological abuse is welcome and encouraged.
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Priest
Ancient Mariner
Location: Frederick, Maryland

Fun with crime!

Post by Priest » Wed Feb 29, 2012 9:50 am

Posting this here for fun's sake. I Bookfaced it last night after the fact while I was still all hot and bothered.

Some cat tried to "mug" me in the early morning when I went to check on my shop.
<a href="http://s37.photobucket.com/albums/e95/y ... 3573_n.jpg" target="_blank"><img src="http://i37.photobucket.com/albums/e95/y ... 3573_n.jpg" border="0" alt="Photobucket"></a>

All is good. The dude gashed my face with a fingernail or key or something during a really, really poor attempt at a GaNgStaR haymaker, which ended up at my collarbone. I gave him a quick right hook in reply, which unfortunately missed his nose and hit his forehead, thereby cracking a bone in my hand. Sigh. He ran off quick after that, and my smoking habit doesn't really allow me to chase after younger dudes anymore. Cops we flagged down. Reports filed.

Good thing I'm not pretty to begin with. :roll:


Priest.
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Rock
Superfudge!
Location: East Coast
Contact:
Contact Rock

Post by Rock » Wed Feb 29, 2012 10:17 am

hmmm, must be due the weather. similar thing happened to me 2 weeks ago.

My would be mugger was detered.


Sorry about the paw.

May I suggest the following alternatives:

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Priest
Ancient Mariner
Location: Frederick, Maryland

Post by Priest » Wed Feb 29, 2012 10:25 am

I was armed at the time. Sucker hit me quick. Didn't seem prudent at the time to reach for my pocket, and given the ineffectiveness of his swing, I didn't figure I needed to go that route. The hand will heal. "Boxer's Fracture" it's called, I guess.
Priest.
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Rock
Superfudge!
Location: East Coast
Contact:
Contact Rock

Post by Rock » Wed Feb 29, 2012 10:32 am

Ahh the old sucker punch...... thats rough. My guy tried the intimadation route.
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Vitiare
Adhuc Homo Novus
Location: Austin, TX

Post by Vitiare » Wed Feb 29, 2012 10:49 am

The guy must have been looking for a quick drug fix to think of going after someone like you. Appearances and all that, you're a scary lookin dood!
"If loud pipes save lives, imagine what training and proper gear could do."
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piccini9
Everybody dies. It's a love story.

Post by piccini9 » Wed Feb 29, 2012 10:51 am

What The Fuck? Doesn't a proper mugging usually consist of two or more assailants, with at least one of them displaying a weapon of some kind?
Idiots. Probably so stupid none of the other muggers will work with them.

fuckin' people :x
Adding pink and unicorns makes everything better.
-roadmissile

Treatment may include things like riding motorcycles and crocheting… whatever it takes to counteract the deleterious effects of existence. - Rolly
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Rock
Superfudge!
Location: East Coast
Contact:
Contact Rock

Post by Rock » Wed Feb 29, 2012 11:16 am

piccini9 wrote:What The Fuck? Doesn't a proper mugging usually consist of two or more assailants, with at least one of them displaying a weapon of some kind?
Idiots. Probably so stupid none of the other muggers will work with them.

fuckin' people :x
2 hoods wandering the Bronx looking for trouble will get picked off by the cops here.

My guy knew what was doing and just picked the wrong mark. I got lucky that: he didn't have back up, try to pull a gun, do something silly or the situation would have turned south fast.

I've been mugged in the past and it involved the following conversation:
Give me your wallet.
here is my money.
I said wallet motherfucker!
Ok but you know what happens when the cops catch you with my IDs in the wallet.
You some government id guy.
Yep...
I'll take your money.
Here's my money,have a good day.....
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roadmissile
Chief Marketing Schwaggerizer
Location: CO

Post by roadmissile » Wed Feb 29, 2012 11:18 am

It's true you don't exactly look like a suburban housewife, glad you're mostly alright.

Hope the hand heals up quick and don't forget the bactine for your face...

/RM
/Speed is our religion.

"If requests are an option, I'd like to be hit by a beautiful and highly trained nurse, driving a marshmallow. Naked. And then she would buy me an ice cream." - Rev
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DerGolgo
Zaphod's Zeitgeist
Location: Potato

Post by DerGolgo » Wed Feb 29, 2012 11:47 am

Glad to hear you're alright.
Hope the medical bills for that fracture won't be too bad.
If there were absolutely anything to be afraid of, don't you think I would have worn pants?

I said I have a big stick.
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CarolinaBoy
Magnum Jihad
Location: Seattle, WA

Post by CarolinaBoy » Wed Feb 29, 2012 2:35 pm

Glad you made it out relatively unscathed. In the moment, it's so hard to remember to make contact with the lead knuckles.
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MagnusTheBuilder
Arbiter of Beard
Location: Denver, CO
Contact:
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Re: Fun with crime!

Post by MagnusTheBuilder » Wed Feb 29, 2012 6:07 pm

Priest wrote:I gave him a quick right hook in reply, which unfortunately missed his nose and hit his forehead, thereby cracking a bone in my hand. Sigh.
Based on lots of research that will happen in 2018 where idiots are scientifically gathered up and beaten, scientifically, about the head and neck region, the most vulnerable point on an idiot found in the wild actually is the forehead, you sir, are ahead of the times.

I'd say what you described was more of an attack/assault than a mugging. Not that it changes how much it sucks to have your personal space and safety violated like that... did he say "Gimmme the Cashhh."? If so, I'd say that would be a mugging.

Hopefully that isn't your drawing hand, even if it is, you're a tough cat, I'm sure you'll be alright. Heal up fast.

Also. Chicks dig scars.

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