UTMC

I actually wrote this, then deleted it because I sounded like a douchebag and a braggart. I'm geeking out, though, and I need to write it out to SOMEBODY, so y'all can just kick me in the nuts if you have a problem.

This has seriously been one of the most awesome summers of my entire life.
Despite being ridiculously broke, and living off of whatever cash I can borrow, sell shit for, earn, finagle, or dig up out of my backyard, I've managed to travel all over the west coast to some really amazing places to do some really amazing shit.
And not only have I traveled all over the west coast, it's all been paid for by hot, awesome women who a doing so just to hang out and have (*ahem*) "special time" with me.
Orcas Island, Seattle, Portland, and now I just spent five solid days riding some of Norcal's most EPIC motorcycle roads with a totally hot bombshell (and great passenger) on the back of my bike.
I've had girls come in from out of town, one super awesome one night stand, and one girl who literally trapped me in my closet to have (*ahem*) a "special moment."

Just a few months ago I had a seriously surly attitude towards dating and women in general (not ALL women, just the ones to whom I was attracted; a defense mechanism that was really kinda gross, sorry ladies).
I've even shot down a few because I felt like I was just going to end up being a total asshole if I did anything with them.
Now I feel like I'm kinda leveling out, and it's coz of all of this fucking ANGELIC attention I've been getting. I've even gone out of my way to thank most of them for their part in pulling my head out of my mean, surly ass.

And not only that, but along the way I've seen some really cool shit, and met some really cool people (including some o' y'all). And really? That five day ride I just went on? Holy shit... Best moto trip EVER.
Now I get to go work a job I love (for the Burning Man festival), camp, and ride my dirtbike out in the desert every day for two solid months. And in the midst of that? In the midst of that I get to bail out to Dallas and be the best man in two VERY dear friends' wedding!

My going away party in Santa Cruz was super badass and well attended, and I've managed to even wrack up some new friends lately. It's all a bucket of rad. Super, super rad.

Shit yeah, dood!

That is all, I just had to share.

Fuck you. Douchebag braggart.

I am envious. Two months in the desert, you fucking douche.

You suck, once I finish this fruity alcoholicly beverage served in a coconut with an umbrella I am going to get off the beach continue know you suck. More snooty topless french tourists, yep you suck.....

Garcon, more of the cocont special, Ce vous plai

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Dick. This is why nobody likes you.

positive attention from the opposite sex really helps the self-esteem!

Fucking man-whore...

You'll have a hot girl show up on your door step carrying a little package. The first thing you'll here is...da da.

Tell us more about this closet of yours.

TTIWWOP

UndertheGun wrote:TTIWWOP

agreed.

And WAFS: Fuck You

Well alright...
But only of the two who are models. The others wouldn't appreciate their photos being put up on the interwebs.
These women are rad. One is a fire performer, the other an aerialist.
I owe both a debt of gratitude for making my summer super awesome, and the fire girl especially for being a friend through the past 11 months of me being stressed out, depressed, and aggro.

Oh... my....

Rock wrote:You suck, once I finish this fruity alcoholicly beverage served in a coconut with an umbrella I am going to get off the beach continue know you suck. More snooty topless french tourists, yep you suck.....

Garcon, more of the cocont special, Ce vous plai

?? when did you join the air force ?


and, on topic...

we've seen this one before, no ?

12ci wrote:?? when did you join the air force ?


and, on topic...

we've seen this one before, no ?

Air Force would have better internet........

WAFS: SEND WHITE WIMMEN!!!!!

12ci wrote:
we've seen this one before, no ?

Yeah, just a different pic.

I thought I told you top stay away from my sister!

Yeah, but you never said anything about your mom!

*kicking you in the nuts*

Others here have wished my mom dead, so this is minor.

Shit, you asshole.

Yea life is totally rad.
last week my friend/roommate had guests stay with us for a few days, two girls from LA, one of them was the girlfriend of one of his bros.
They were lookers fer sure. After he assured me(himself) I had no chance till i get my hair fixed, the second night guess who followed me into my room to help me fall asleep? His pals girl. The details are a little fuzzy since we all broke in to the large stash of Flexaril, and Xzanex I found working last year in the for mentioned desert, most of witch was a bright yellow or purple powder from the major dryness, but the next morning was neat-o.
As the day wore the fuzz off I figured it was a fluke because of our mental state, and the multi colored residue on my kleenex. Next night we all ended up hanging in our living room havin a few beers, I didnt mention it at all, My buddy made up a sofa with sheets for her to sleep on in his office, but when I went to bed... yep repeater.
Next thing I knew she was gone, talk about low maintenance, guess she couldn't keep it as quiet as me cause my buddy ragged on me the day after because of all the calls from the two of them. Oh well hee hee, silly me.
Come to think of it I have a better one to bragg about, and Im new to this crew and hope Im not getting out of hand with my "content" but a few weeks earlier Im at Zeitgeist, I run into this hot corporate gal I play pool with around the mission, have flirted with her on many occasions when I met her a year ago, got nowhere, find out she had a dude(not from her I kinda knew him) dropped it.
Shes with this totally cute friend and I join em, few beers later on conversation turns to wacky times past stories, this rarely happens to me right(snick!) and I end up telling some story involving Xzanex and debauchery, and her friend mentioned how much she liked that stuff, and off we went on a thread about that sort of thing.
So later on my hot corporate friend invites us to her new apartment for a warming of sorts, and "pop" I suddenly remember the containers of yellow and purple stuff from the desert, and that its behind the seat of my truck! Damn good thing I never got searched in the last 9 months! Upon revealing this to them they say bring it. Address is given and Im off in the truck.
Anyhow after a bottle of wine and some more laughs, out of nowhere they start making out, and before you can say "now thats interesting" we are sans clothing, and, well.. If there were video cameras in the apartment I might be offered a career change. Yea my life is fucking rad.
Now I don't want to seem like I endorse controlled substances, but Im up to no less than 5 epic events like this since I found that little medicine pouch working for the largest party in the USA, and that is the same number of times I broke it out, hell I forgot I had it! So what ever, you all seem to know your way around a wild time. Live it up,

and...

Braggart, I hope you get crabs.....

tucko wrote:Braggart, I hope you get crabs.....

hhhmmmm.... i loves me some chesapeake blue crabs



steamed in beer with a touch of old bay.....

I'm liking this DoubleR character already.

Mmmmm Steamed in beer and butter!
Yo sleep Dep when you out to the playa?

Mmmmm Steamed in beer and butter!
Yo sleep Dep when you out to the playa?

I done been here since the 26th.
Riding my dirt bike like a motherfucker (I went out and tore it up at Trego dunes yesterday).
(Oh, and btw, tore it up is a relative term since I have very little skill on dirt).
When are YOU getting out here?

As soon as I git a KTM600cc flog monster!
But seriously about the 15th Im workin my ass off fixing the locomotives at the port.