UTMC

It's here.
The ladies are out in their short shorts.
It's in the mid sixties.
I am laying on a park bench.
And I am a little... too... warm.

I will do my best to send this weather eastward.
It's coming.
Sooooon....

Fuck off. Spring isn't for another 2 months.

That groundhog lied to me again didn't he.

rolly wrote:Fuck off. Spring isn't for another 2 months.

Truth

nate wrote:

rolly wrote:Fuck off. Spring isn't for another 2 months.

Truth

+1!

WeAintFoundShit wrote:It's here.
The ladies are out in their short shorts.
It's in the mid sixties.
I am laying on a park bench.
And I am a little... too... warm.

I will do my best to send this weather eastward.
It's coming.
Sooooon....

get a job hippy!

goose wrote:

WeAintFoundShit wrote:It's here.
The ladies are out in their short shorts.
It's in the mid sixties.
I am laying on a park bench.
And I am a little... too... warm.

I will do my best to send this weather eastward.
It's coming.
Sooooon....

get a job hippy!

What he said. And fuck off while you're at it! Damn car has been hard starting and finally wouldn't start at all this morning. Looks like I'm back on two full time for a while and the forecast is high 30's/low 40's and heavy rain for the next ten days.

Freezing rain tomorrow. YAY!

In the three acres or so of my property I see maybe ten square feet of brown grass. If that's spring I'm going to shoot myself. 12F tonight.

No No No, you misunderstand me, spring is here, where I am.

I am doing my best to send it y'alls way.
It will be there sooooon.

Sooooooon.

blinded driving east
anticipate going home
blinded driving west

Spring. Confirmed. I can't find anyone to work on the exhaust of my ZL. "too much work right now, come back in winter" they say.

This thread is now the best thread.

Snow falls on cold roads
No money for gas anyway
Sad motorcycle

Looks like I peed pants
Zipper broke on new rain gear
Back to dealership.

gray skies brown grass
spring is lurking behind dead trees
like a pedofile

Daylight Savings Time
Give me a little more Sun
I am not a bat.

Springtime in Libya
"We must enforce no-fly zone!"
Trepan me now, please

Rev wrote:

dozer wrote:gray skies brown grass
spring is lurking behind dead trees
like a pedofile

That's fucking awful.
Syllables are all fucked up.
Please learn to haiku.

Archaic stucture
Damn Japanese poetry
It's worse than Twitter

Coherent discourse
My thoughts are limited to
One hundred forty.

--Jaeger

Sunday at the track
Hippy on orange Motard
Backing in corner

Rain pants warranteed
Should have dry ride home tonight
Now to fix the Benz.

remove axe from door
turn to burying bodies
spring has sprung Yippee!

I love this thread!

read Cala Kid's post
got fifteen buck leg armor
no pepperoni knees

WAFS says spring's here
he's in California
did it for the lulz

still fucking raining
today is good day to ride
Oregon winter

WAFS rides in sun
I'm stuck in torrential rain
Earhtquakes? BAH! still jealous

cold and rainy day
I wore jeans with holes in them
I'm such a dumbass

gear up for a good ride
raining like motherfucker
stuck in coffeehouse

I try write haiku
but no room for joining-words
now sound like Matpoc

talking to police
what does UTMC mean
unicorns stole my car



From Full Throttle, one of the coolest video games ever:

<iframe title="YouTube video player" width="480" height="390" src="http://www.youtube.com/embed/8ddJFq_UKU0" frameborder="0" allowfullscreen></iframe>



Edit: Just realized I used Goose's name in all my haikus instead of WAFS, I must still be spiteful from previous years Corrections made.

Beemer Dan wrote: talking to police
what does UTMC mean
unicorns stole my car

Border cops won't laugh
no sense of humour in booth
rubber gloves no lube.

LOL! You could always try...

stormtrooper inquires
not the droids your looking for
force powers kick ass

You whiney non-Cals
whining abpout your weather
and no lane-splitting

It's 80 down here,
no clouds, beautiful lunch ride
why you alll so glum?

I'm very happy
and wish you could lane-split home
then smoke legal bud

Yes, California's
the place to be, to fire up
your bike or your bong

So chill, my good peeps
be happpy that I can ride
for us all--year round

For you I must do,
and ride in sunny warm clime
your hero--Zer0

DISCLAIMER--these 5-7-5 haiku in no way imply I subscribe to this clumsy, outdated mode of English language Haiku structure, but I do this to humor you Haiku Luddites.

California Spring
Fuels East Coast Resentment
My bike roars for thee

Snow gives way to rain
Freezes, tuning all to ice
That's tonight's weather

If I can't be there
Sink, California, sink
But save highway 1

what the fuck say you
eat my ass you waste of life
i miss brunch with UTMC

Motard on bike path.
The best way to get around.
Hope I don't get caught.

It's a haiku feud.
We are cold and they are warm.
East Coast v. West Coast.

Biggie and 2PAC
were nothing compared to this
bitter rivalry.

The Cali UTs
bring the mu'fuggin sweetness.
All else--you been brought

Warmth hits the East Coast.
You can all quit bitching now.
Told you I'd send spring.