UTMC

What kind of woman would go with you to the track, just to watch you ride; then go with you to band practice, because it was organized at the last minute, and "sure, why not, I can listen to your music and draw;" then say "Hey, can you please teach me to ride dirt bikes tomorrow?" then cook you a steak dinner, then help you clean your garage?
Did I mention that she flew here from Toronto just to hang out with me?
Did I mention that she's a genius?
Did I mention that she's hot?

Holy hell.
She's a keeper.

DOROTHY
No. But it wasn't a dream -- it was a place.
And you -- and you -- and you -- and you were
there.

PROFESSOR
Oh --
(others laugh)

DOROTHY
But you couldn't have been, could you?

AUNT EM
Oh, we dream lots of silly things when we --

DOROTHY
No, Aunt Em -- this was a real, truly live
place.

DOROTHY
Doesn't anybody believe me?

UNCLE HENRY
Of course we believe you, Dorothy.

gotta be some kind of catch there.
check for an ankle bracelet? (the electronic kind)
needle tracks? check the eyes and under the tongue too.
any loose teeth?
did you check for a penis? some times they hide the damn things.

I'd be deeply suspicious that you're doing something wrong and are about to be punished for it.

Welcome to my paranoid mind.

A guy with your charms could pretty much set up a weekend testosterone clinic for the ladies. Kind of like a spa thing where they travel to immerse themselves in a new world, except less indulgent, more dangerous, and probably with different facials.

this kind!

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thack wrote:gotta be some kind of catch there.
check for an ankle bracelet? (the electronic kind)
needle tracks? check the eyes and under the tongue too.
any loose teeth?
did you check for a penis? some times they hide the damn things.

OR SHE'S A ROBOT.

thack wrote:gotta be some kind of catch there.
check for an ankle bracelet? (the electronic kind)
needle tracks? check the eyes and under the tongue too.
any loose teeth?
did you check for a penis? some times they hide the damn things.

Yep


I'm convinced all the good ones are already taken and we're left with the nutjobs nobody wants

Yep


I'm convinced all the good ones are already taken and we're left with the nutjobs nobody wants

yep. so true.

Toonce(s) wrote:this kind!

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I'd hit it.

SidVicious wrote:I'd hit it.

I would too.

pattio.

Also, pics. and perhaps a video of her talking to us. and then maybe we'll believe you.

I feel your pain.....

Twenty eight years ago, I found my 1953 Indian, but didn't quite have enough money to spring for it. My new girlfriend said she'd come up with the rest of the cash.

One of the outcomes was twenty seven years of being happily married. She puts up with my motorcycle addiction, and, if I want to ride to, say, Alaska, she says, "Have fun, be safe, and come back to me."

Oh, yeah, she was (is) cute and extremely intelligent/well educated.

Tom in Salem

chiefrider wrote:I feel your pain.....

Twenty eight years ago, I found my 1953 Indian, but didn't quite have enough money to spring for it. My new girlfriend said she'd come up with the rest of the cash.

One of the outcomes was twenty seven years of being happily married. She puts up with my motorcycle addiction, and, if I want to ride to, say, Alaska, she says, "Have fun, be safe, and come back to me."

Oh, yeah, she was (is) cute and extremely intelligent/well educated.

Tom in Salem

Your wife and mine are cut from the same cloth. In fact mine willingly emptied my piss-bag and gave me sponge baths after my big wreck, and she still agreed to marry me after that.

chiefrider wrote:She puts up with my motorcycle addiction, and, if I want to ride to, say, Alaska, she says, "Have fun, be safe, and come back to me."

for what it's worth, i've yet to find a guy matching that description either.

First off: I love this place; y'all are awesome.

Secondly: the girl (most definitely a girl) just extended her stay for another week.

For my birthday, she designed a bomb (though clearly a non-functional one) and built it on a 3D printer. It was round with a fuse sticking out of the top, old school style. It was mounted on a pedestal, in which there was a digital timer that counted down to right about noon on my birthday. At the end of the countdown, a latching mechanism released and the bomb opened into four pieces, inside of which was a destroyed city (the idea for which she got from "Romantically Apocalyptic") and a mushroom cloud that said "KABOOM" across it.
There was also a full, 1950's style brochure that she had designed and made about a post apocalyptic vacation living scenario, and a story explaining how the world had accidentally plunged itself into nuclear war due to a comedy of errors linked to radical militarism and OWS.
She then broke contact with me for a few days, and the next I heard from her was when I received a tattered and soiled dress shirt in the mail, with journal entries scribbled on it about her trip across the wastelands from Toronto to SF in search of me to see if I was still alive, along with a map to an abandoned hospital at an abandoned naval base somewhat near my house, with the instructions that I was to meet here there at midnight on a certain day. We explored a bunch of abandoned buildings, and ended up having sex in a particularly interesting and difficult to reach spot, in full view of a security guard, who couldn't figure out how to get to us in order to kick us out (we waved at him as we left, and he seemed none too pleased, and made sure to follow us off of the island; whether he was actually doing his job, or just hoping for another free show, will forever remain unanswered).

And she's a dirtbike natural, and laughs off her crashes.
Also, she used to be a professional fighter who got flown all over the world for one of those companies who pays the girls more if they fight topless. (Only she didn't fight topless; instead she kept her clothes on and kicked a bunch of ass so she could travel to exotic locations and get paid to do it.)


And yet, somehow, despite all of this, she's not crazy, dramatic, or any sort of basket case. All I can do is thank the lord for my good fortune and her poor judgment.

This whole thread makes me happy for everyone.

That is fucking AWESOME. Seriously, so full of win, I love the story.

I have one that I thought was pretty good that involves an acid trip, a circus tent, a motorcycle ride and sex on a rooftop at sunset, but yours is in fact superior and I must now step my game up.

Ya know the nerd girl from American Pie? Ya know "one time, at band camp..." that chick? I basically have that girl, only with a multicolored dread mohawk. We spent new years eve welding up a wall sconce out of scrap metal I salvaged from the nuclear lab dumpster. Today I taught her how to surf. Also, speaking of pie, she's baking me one right now. Another one. This would be pie number four.
I hate to keep on about it, but at this point, I'm pretty sure I've been in a horrible motorcycle accident, and I'm just in a really awesome coma.

Intelligent women = Hot.