"The Talk"

Bo_9 · Post by **Bo_9** » Sat Nov 28, 2009 12:27 am

I don't recall ever having "the talk". Dad wasn't there and Mom was, well Mom. "We don't talk about such things"...

Dad got back too late to do much good but despite a really messed up "upbringing" I hope to follow the "open and honest" lead represented here with my kids (5 and 3) when they ask. Would be much more helpful then what I got. Seems to have worked for my friend, his 14yo was babysitting her best friends baby the other night, instant birth control. Open and honest seems to have worked alright for her too.

flounder · Post by **flounder** » Sat Nov 28, 2009 12:41 am

I had this talk with my son a couple years ago (he's 17 now). Asked if he understood the mechanics....he did....so we talked about the potential consequences.

Luckily, I have a couple of my cousins kids and he has a step brother or two who can be used as good bad examples. A couple of them have totally screwed up their lives for a few minutes of pleasure. They will most likely never realize their dreams now that they have kids and will spend the rest of their lives suporting same.

I also mentioned that, given my finances, I wouldnt be able to help if he got himself into trouble.

And thats about all you can do. In the end, they have to make the decision and we, as parents, can only hope they have been paying attention.....

I told a newly pregnant co-worker the other day that she is going to get lots of advice over the next few months of her pregnancy. the only thing I told her is having a kid is the hardest and also the best job you can ever have.

Thats my .02 cents worth.

UndertheGun · Post by **UndertheGun** » Sat Nov 28, 2009 3:45 am

I never got "The Talk" but was probably six when my parents started talking to me about sex creating a comfortable atmosphere for sex/reproductive health/drugs/etc. to be discussed, at any age, is super important and probably the earlier the better.

Just for kicks.
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JustNate · Post by **JustNate** » Sat Nov 28, 2009 4:36 am

Our daughter will get informed
Her date will get "The Talk" the old fashioned way.

Zer0 · Post by **Zer0** » Thu Dec 03, 2009 2:47 pm

Good boy, N8.

I never got the talk--ever.

We have 2 boys, 4 and 7. The 7 yr old has already asked questions "how did I come out of mommy" "how did I get inside her?" He's very inquisitive, and he's nowhere near any pubescent sexuality phase of his life, soi I told him and he wasn't grossed ot freaked out--it was more a biology lesson for a 1st grader.

Actuallly, the funnest "talk" I've ever had are the ones with my wife since we became parents, reminding her that, at puberty, our boys are going to be going to the bathroom a LOT more than before, and spending more time in the shower, and not to think that they've suddenly developed a sense of personal hygeine normally lacking in pubescent boys.

And to be careful about opening closed bathroom or bedroom doors.

Boy am I glad I have my two boys, as opposed to my buddy who has 3 girls, age 1, 5 and 10. Loooong drawn out pain for the next 15-20 years for that dumb fool.

MagnusTheBuilder · Post by **MagnusTheBuilder** » Thu Dec 03, 2009 3:13 pm

It isn't called "The Ultimate Sacrifice" for nothing. I'm just sayin'.

GOSTAZ · Post by **GOSTAZ** » Thu Dec 03, 2009 3:25 pm

Wade right in, use the condoms as the reason you need to know what he knows, and correct any misinformation.

Raising kids is messy and weird, but if you start being frank with them now? It makes stuff easier.

As modern and open as I sound? I still instructed my daughter to let potential suitors know that her bio dad is a farmboy gun owner with very primitive and set rules about how she is to be treated.

My son is 13 and I have not broached a lot with him, but when he asks? Just tell him the truth. Blush, cough, tell them it is awkward, and go.

Number one Rule?

Want some love? Use the glove!

Bigshankhank · Post by **Bigshankhank** » Fri Dec 04, 2009 5:04 am

Zer0 wrote: Boy am I glad I have my two boys, as opposed to my buddy who has 3 girls, age 1, 5 and 10. Loooong drawn out pain for the next 15-20 years for that dumb fool.

If you have a son, you only have to worry about one prick, if you have a daughter you have to worry about every prick outside your door.

JustNate · Post by **JustNate** » Fri Dec 04, 2009 7:17 am

Bigshankhank wrote: If you have a son, you only have to worry about one prick, if you have a daughter you have to worry about every prick outside your door.

Thanks Hank, now I have to invest in a street sweeper!

Metalredneck · Post by **Metalredneck** » Fri Dec 04, 2009 10:17 am

If we can combine "The Talk" with the gourmet spunk thread, we could have some serious industry, people! Birth control AND cuisine.

MoraleHazard · Post by **MoraleHazard** » Fri Dec 04, 2009 12:25 pm

I never got "the talk" as a kid. Kind of wish I did.

I don't have kids yet, but I'm hoping to be quite honest w/ my kids on sex, its consequences, the interpersonal mushiness, etc. I don't believe in the cleaning the shotgun routine, but just presenting the aura of someone not to be trifled with, esp. with some scumbag who might have evil designs on my daughter or son.

I don't agree our Western sexual mores. I don't believe one can divorce the pleasure of sex with it's procreative nature and have long-term happy consequences. This isn't a judgement of anyone here; I believed similarly for a long time.

Oh, and GG's list is hilarious.

scumbag · Post by **scumbag** » Fri Dec 04, 2009 12:40 pm

MoraleHazard wrote:with some scumbag who might have evil designs on my daughter

I resent that.

MoraleHazard · Post by **MoraleHazard** » Fri Dec 04, 2009 1:32 pm

scumbag wrote:
MoraleHazard wrote:with some scumbag who might have evil designs on my daughter
I resent that.

present company excluded, of course.

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"The Talk"