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Cloak and Dagger

A forum for the off topic stuff. Everything from religion to philosophy to sex to humor (see why it used to be called Buggery?). All manner of rude psychological abuse is welcome and encouraged.
piccini9
Everybody dies. It's a love story.

Cloak and Dagger

Post by piccini9 » Wed Jun 22, 2011 1:06 pm

So, on my street are a couple of pretty serious speed bumps, people bottom out on them all the time.
Today I found in the road, right near one of them, a small Pelican type case with a ginormous magnet attached, alongside a battery and some kind of electronic device. The battery serial number has been blacked out, and the device itself has no markings on it at all. In the device however is a SIM card, with the name Oberthur on it.
I called Oberthur, and they said they just make the cards and have no idea what they might be used for. (wink-wink) :wink:

The battery still ha a charge on it.
What should I do with this thing?
a) Give it to the cops, see what they think?
b) Stick it on the vehicle of someone I don't like?
c) Mail the thing to Tierra Del Fuego?
d)... open to suggestions...

Option "b)" may be tricky because I kinda want to keep the awesome little Pelican case.

I'll post pics if you guys are interested.


Adding pink and unicorns makes everything better.
-roadmissile

Treatment may include things like riding motorcycles and crocheting… whatever it takes to counteract the deleterious effects of existence. - Rolly

rolly
Tim Horton hears a Who?
Location: Greater Trauma Area
Contact:

Post by rolly » Wed Jun 22, 2011 1:08 pm

Definitely post pics.

piccini9
Everybody dies. It's a love story.

Post by piccini9 » Wed Jun 22, 2011 1:22 pm

The case measures 5"x 3 1/2" about the size of a wallet. (see wallet in picture. The battery slipped into the unit accidentally when I brought it in the house, and some lights started blinking, so I took the battery out immediately. Don't need any CIA spooks knocking on my door.
I might be able to make out the numbers on the battery. I'm pretty sure that won't tell me anything, but why did someone bother to black it out?

Image
Last edited by piccini9 on Wed Jun 22, 2011 4:15 pm, edited 1 time in total.
Adding pink and unicorns makes everything better.
-roadmissile

Treatment may include things like riding motorcycles and crocheting… whatever it takes to counteract the deleterious effects of existence. - Rolly

User avatar
MATPOC
The Unreasonable Ukranian
Location: Providence, RI

Post by MATPOC » Wed Jun 22, 2011 1:23 pm

Nice, stick it on a cop car!

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DerGolgo
Zaphod's Zeitgeist
Location: Potato

Post by DerGolgo » Wed Jun 22, 2011 1:35 pm

piccini9 wrote:but why did someone bother to black it out?
If it isn't gubmint, it might be private. Somebody snooping on a cheating spouse, industrial espionage, insurance investigation, any sort of thing. In other words, somebody bugged a car without the legal right to do so, or at least suspecting it might be illegal, or just not having any desire to have that thing tracked back to them.
Heck, could be drug dealers, the mob, any sort of unsavoury character trying to work out a movement profile of someone they dislike.
Or could be some company monitoring wether employee X is really clocking up the miles he puts on his expense report.
If it's private, chances are whoever used it will just swallow the loss. No legal recourse in illegal activities, is there.
If it's gubmint, they obviously don't want anyone to know it actually is gubmint, but if they find you, they might still give you grief...you could be an accomplice, for all they know you removed the device from the target car on purpose.
"The defendant claims that this high-tech equipment somehow detached itself due to the car going over a speed bump, and he just happened to find it by the side of the road. Not only does this statement form agent whatshisname show that this would be highly unlikely, as he has many years of experience in mounting these trackers of suspect cars, but also, if he found it at the side of the road, how does the defendant happen to know the means by which the tracker was removed from the car? Members of the jury, it is obvious that he removed the tracker himself, and the only possible motive for this can be that he was paid to do so by dread crack-cocaine-terrorist Muhammed Babykiller, who remains at large because of the defendant!"

All kidding aside, I'd turn it in and avoid the possible aggro.
If there were absolutely anything to be afraid of, don't you think I would have worn pants?

I said I have a big stick.

piccini9
Everybody dies. It's a love story.

Post by piccini9 » Wed Jun 22, 2011 2:00 pm

Hey! Don't be slagging my boy Mohammed Babykiller, me and Momo go way back.

To whom should I "turn it in?" Local cops? State? Call the Feds?
I don't even like James Bond movies, but this shit is really interesting to me.
Adding pink and unicorns makes everything better.
-roadmissile

Treatment may include things like riding motorcycles and crocheting… whatever it takes to counteract the deleterious effects of existence. - Rolly

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Rock
Superfudge!
Location: East Coast
Contact:

Post by Rock » Wed Jun 22, 2011 2:04 pm

call me
Image

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Sisyphus
Rigging the Ancient Mariner
Location: The Muckworks
Contact:

Post by Sisyphus » Wed Jun 22, 2011 2:51 pm

Sherrif. The sherrifs have different legal authorities than the feds and everyone else. If they get it, they'll be asking questions of whom it belongs to and why it was found in their county.

Otherwise, hack it or give it to some fishermen.
Sent from my POS laptop plugged into the wall

calamari kid
Ayatollah of Mayhem
Location: Lake Shitty

Post by calamari kid » Wed Jun 22, 2011 3:47 pm

Stick it in a tree nearby and turn it back on, then wait to see who comes looking.
"Go soothingly on the grease mud, as there lurks the skid demon." -Honda manual circa 1962

"Being shot out of a cannon will always be better than being squeezed out of a tube. That is why God made fast motorcycles, Bubba...." -Hunter S Thompson

"A psychotic is a guy who's just found out what's going on." -William S. Burroughs

Zer0
Professor of Poop
Location: Smoggy Valley--east of Smog City

Post by Zer0 » Wed Jun 22, 2011 4:10 pm

Slap it on the next Westboro Baptist Church van that rolls through.

(you can atttract them by organizing a gay veteran parade. I'll send a donation for the cause. Git on it)
'74 R90/6--Thor
'05 Sportster 1200--FrankenRat
My boy D when he was 4 wrote:Bones aren't important--we like motorcycles.
High Kommand wrote:That's the problem with giving a bike a girl's name. Too much temptation to lay it down to examine the undercarriage...

piccini9
Everybody dies. It's a love story.

Post by piccini9 » Wed Jun 22, 2011 4:13 pm

Zer0 wrote:Slap it on the next Westboro Baptist Church van that rolls through.

(you can atttract them by organizing a gay veteran parade. I'll send a donation for the cause. Git on it)
They were supposed to come here last year, but they realized there was no safe place to stand and protest so they bagged out.
Pussies.
Adding pink and unicorns makes everything better.
-roadmissile

Treatment may include things like riding motorcycles and crocheting… whatever it takes to counteract the deleterious effects of existence. - Rolly

piccini9
Everybody dies. It's a love story.

Post by piccini9 » Wed Jun 22, 2011 4:16 pm

piccini9 wrote:The case measures 5"x 3 1/2" about the size of a wallet. (see wallet in picture. The battery slipped into the unit accidentally when I brought it in the house, and some lights started blinking, so I took the battery out immediately. Don't need any CIA spooks knocking on my door.
I might be able to make out the numbers on the battery. I'm pretty sure that won't tell me anything, but why did someone bother to black it out?

Image
My mistake.
Turns out it was not a tracking device at all, but a tuna melt on whole wheat with tomato.
Yummy.
Adding pink and unicorns makes everything better.
-roadmissile

Treatment may include things like riding motorcycles and crocheting… whatever it takes to counteract the deleterious effects of existence. - Rolly

Zer0
Professor of Poop
Location: Smoggy Valley--east of Smog City

Post by Zer0 » Wed Jun 22, 2011 5:05 pm

Duh. I thought you already knew that. That's why I suggested the WBC -- because the tuna was probably dolphin-safe, and we all know dolphins are gay, so the WBC would flip when they saw a gay-dolphin safe tuna melt slapped on their armegeddon assault vehicle.

:|

By the way, that's one damn good looking sandwitch
Last edited by Zer0 on Wed Jun 22, 2011 5:27 pm, edited 1 time in total.
'74 R90/6--Thor
'05 Sportster 1200--FrankenRat
My boy D when he was 4 wrote:Bones aren't important--we like motorcycles.
High Kommand wrote:That's the problem with giving a bike a girl's name. Too much temptation to lay it down to examine the undercarriage...

Bestguess
Casper the Friendly Ghost

Post by Bestguess » Wed Jun 22, 2011 5:11 pm

piccini9,

PM me with pics of this please...
'05 SV 650 (SOLD)
'07 Ducati 1098s(Fixing it, Bitches!)
'09 BMW GS 1200
_________________________________
Gene Police!
You there, out of the Pool!!!

-"WTF, that little piece of plastic cost how much...!"me, looking for OEM Duc fairings
-“…Despite the massive masculinity which a new BMW inflicts upon the senses of passersby, there is something almost ladylike in the manner in which it attacks a curve. A feminine determination to win through manipulation, to bend the curve to its will.
'77 BMW bike ad

Zer0
Professor of Poop
Location: Smoggy Valley--east of Smog City

Post by Zer0 » Wed Jun 22, 2011 5:29 pm

Bestguess wrote:piccini9,

PM me with pics of this please...
Better yet, just send him the sandwitch
'74 R90/6--Thor
'05 Sportster 1200--FrankenRat
My boy D when he was 4 wrote:Bones aren't important--we like motorcycles.
High Kommand wrote:That's the problem with giving a bike a girl's name. Too much temptation to lay it down to examine the undercarriage...

User avatar
Sisyphus
Rigging the Ancient Mariner
Location: The Muckworks
Contact:

Post by Sisyphus » Wed Jun 22, 2011 5:53 pm

E-bay it.
Sent from my POS laptop plugged into the wall

Ames
Megachiroptera Übermench
Location: Denver, CO in MY OWN DAMN HOUSE!
Contact:

Post by Ames » Thu Jun 23, 2011 2:14 pm

Sisyphus wrote:E-bay it.
The sandwich?
Cheers,
Ames.
Whatever doesn't kill you, only makes you...stranger!
Quid Ita Serius?
You never know how much you appreciate your civil liberties until they've been violated.

piccini9
Everybody dies. It's a love story.

Post by piccini9 » Thu Jun 23, 2011 2:25 pm

I love you guys. :D
Adding pink and unicorns makes everything better.
-roadmissile

Treatment may include things like riding motorcycles and crocheting… whatever it takes to counteract the deleterious effects of existence. - Rolly

Beemer Dan
Dark Poohbah
Location: Oregon
Contact:

Post by Beemer Dan » Thu Jun 23, 2011 3:15 pm

I vote that you go to the local branch of the dept of homeland security and turn in tuna melt sandwich in a box. Tell them that you found it on the street and you don't want any part of whatever legal or illegal activities it could be involved in. Then leave before they can get your name or any information about you.

If for some reason you then end up with G-men showing up at the door you can say "Oh no, I thought my dog ate that sandwich... but that means...". The feds will then want to bring your dog in as "evidence", but you'll have none of that! After a long standoff, you'll escape out the back with your dog, hopping on your bike (you should probably start saving for a sidecar now) and lead them on a long chase that goes on for ten years. You're faster, smarter and cooler than the cops, but somehow they can track your every move. Your life is a high stakes dash from one small middle-america town to the next. You and Cocheese (that's your dog's name, if it isn't, take care of that asap) do your best to help out the good people you meet, but never for too long, because the man is hot on your trail! Every time you stop somewhere, you'll try and order a tuna melt. Between the small New Mexico town where you have to help fend off an alien invasion, to the sleepy Michigan village where the local sheriff outlawed sandwiches, you manage to only have enough luck to get business done and get out before the G-Men catch up.

You'll be known as The Riding Picinnis, or Cocheese and the Big Tuna, or The Man With The Golden Sandwich.
They swore it was the correct one, but swearing doesn't make a sprocket fit where it doesn't want to. --WeAintFoundShit

WeAintFoundShit
Ayatollah of Mayhem
Location: Davis

Post by WeAintFoundShit » Thu Jun 23, 2011 4:53 pm

piccini9 wrote:I love you guys. :D
I love sandwiches.
"The grip on the right is the fun regulator." -Donny Greene

I crash a lot.

Bestguess
Casper the Friendly Ghost

Post by Bestguess » Thu Jun 23, 2011 6:25 pm

Ok,
I'll take the sandwich and the blinky light thingy.
You keep the case.... :mrgreen:
'05 SV 650 (SOLD)
'07 Ducati 1098s(Fixing it, Bitches!)
'09 BMW GS 1200
_________________________________
Gene Police!
You there, out of the Pool!!!

-"WTF, that little piece of plastic cost how much...!"me, looking for OEM Duc fairings
-“…Despite the massive masculinity which a new BMW inflicts upon the senses of passersby, there is something almost ladylike in the manner in which it attacks a curve. A feminine determination to win through manipulation, to bend the curve to its will.
'77 BMW bike ad

piccini9
Everybody dies. It's a love story.

Post by piccini9 » Thu Jun 23, 2011 6:32 pm

Bestguess wrote:Ok,
I'll take the sandwich and the blinky light thingy.
You keep the case.... :mrgreen:
Deal.
Adding pink and unicorns makes everything better.
-roadmissile

Treatment may include things like riding motorcycles and crocheting… whatever it takes to counteract the deleterious effects of existence. - Rolly

User avatar
Sisyphus
Rigging the Ancient Mariner
Location: The Muckworks
Contact:

Post by Sisyphus » Fri Jun 24, 2011 4:12 am

So what's the deal? What'd you do with it?
Sent from my POS laptop plugged into the wall

SpecialK
Magnum Jihad
Location: 'round

Post by SpecialK » Fri Jun 24, 2011 10:24 am

Oh he has to have eaten that thing by now.

piccini9
Everybody dies. It's a love story.

Post by piccini9 » Fri Jun 24, 2011 11:31 am

Turns out it's not as cool as I thought it was. No black Ops, no spooks, just package delivery tracking, or similar.
I may plug it in and mail it to one of you miscreants. :D
Adding pink and unicorns makes everything better.
-roadmissile

Treatment may include things like riding motorcycles and crocheting… whatever it takes to counteract the deleterious effects of existence. - Rolly

Beemer Dan
Dark Poohbah
Location: Oregon
Contact:

Post by Beemer Dan » Fri Jun 24, 2011 1:50 pm

Does this mean I have to call Lorenzo Lamas back and tell him the gig is off?
They swore it was the correct one, but swearing doesn't make a sprocket fit where it doesn't want to. --WeAintFoundShit

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DerGolgo
Zaphod's Zeitgeist
Location: Potato

Post by DerGolgo » Fri Jun 24, 2011 2:12 pm

Beemer Dan wrote:Does this mean I have to call Lorenzo Lamas back and tell him the gig is off?
Wait, you wanted to cast Lorenzo in your little "man and his dog" show?
He doesn't nearly have the depth of character to carry a dog.
That's a Joshua Jackson part, if anything. Or John Simm, if you want to go older, and more British.
If there were absolutely anything to be afraid of, don't you think I would have worn pants?

I said I have a big stick.

User avatar
Sisyphus
Rigging the Ancient Mariner
Location: The Muckworks
Contact:

Post by Sisyphus » Fri Jun 24, 2011 3:04 pm

piccini9 wrote:Turns out it's not as cool as I thought it was. No black Ops, no spooks, just package delivery tracking, or similar.
:D
Image

Get rid of it.
Sent from my POS laptop plugged into the wall

Ames
Megachiroptera Übermench
Location: Denver, CO in MY OWN DAMN HOUSE!
Contact:

Post by Ames » Fri Jun 24, 2011 8:35 pm

But BuestGuess is still getting the sandwich...right?
Cheers,
Ames.
Whatever doesn't kill you, only makes you...stranger!
Quid Ita Serius?
You never know how much you appreciate your civil liberties until they've been violated.

User avatar
Bigshankhank
Fully Autonomous Cock-Puncher
Location: Exiled to Living in a Van Down By The River
Contact:

Post by Bigshankhank » Sat Jun 25, 2011 4:00 am

Came here looking for something else...
Image

I love Dabney Coleman.
It's time for Humankind to ditch the imaginary friends of our species' childhood and grow the fuck up.
-Davros

"Lasse mich deine Seele dem Herrscher der Finsternis opfern"

Let me sacrifice your soul to the ruler of darkness

Always carry a bottle of whiskey when you travel in case of a snakebite. Futhermore, always carry a small snake.

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