Rules for female passengers on street bikes...
1. If you have no bike but just happen to have your own helmet in your car we know your playing us for a ride.
2. If your going to go for a ride go with the nicest bike he's the one who is least likely to crash and kill you. If he has a nice bike he's probably been ridding a while. If you go with a tool who has a 86 ninja 250 we are all going to laugh at you. Plus use your head if his bike looks broke then so is he DUHHH!
3. If the bike is a "Stunt bike" or rashed up all over reconsider there is a reason its rashed up.
4. If you're FAT! Save yourself some embarrassment and save us the aggravation of trying to tell you no with out saying cuz "YOU'RE FAT!!!! We can only be sooo nice. Use your head.
5. If your friend is ugly or FAT (See rule 4) it is not my responsibility to get someone to take her.
6. If you have on a skirt then YES!!! We have to go first. No one else knows how to get where we are going... (Right guys?)
7. Showing your nice boobies will get you selected first for a bike ride.
8. STOP!!!!! F***ing bashing your Pep-Boys helmet into the back of my $600 custom helmet... thank you!
9. Move back and stick your ass out... your squishing my nuts.
10. Stop scratching my tank with your fake J-Lo ring set.
11. Yes it is too possible to jerk me off while I'm riding my bike, rubbing gently works too... (Note: This will also ensure you another bike ride anytime)
12. It is customary to pay for motorcycle rides with oral sex. (NOTE: If your skills aren't up to par it is definitely ok to have a girlfriend of yours assist you. Team work is what it's all about.)
13. We know when a girl likes the bike and not us. If every time we call it's always the same **** can we go on the bike.... NO!!!!..... It's fugging March biotch.
14. Don't lean this bike, it has one driver and it's me. So sit there and relax.
15. No you're not going to "GO FLYING RIGHT OFF" (Unless you piss me off then it's a possibility.)
16. Yes I'm going to go fast... stop being a pu$$y.
17. Yes I just adjusted my mirrors to see your boobs.
18. When we stop at a gas station, you are not guarenteed a return trip. Know your role and maybe you get dropped off close to where you were found.
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this will zero the unread anything for you, so you can strive forth into the exciting world of the new cookie thing.
Because the board got shutdown again because of a load of database, I had to fettle with the settings again.
As part of that, the server no longer stores what topics you have or haven't read.
IT IS STILL RECORDED!
But now, that information lives in a delicious cookie, rather than the forum database.
Upside: this should reduce the load of database.
Downside: if you use multiple devices to access the board, or you reject delicious cookies, you won't always have that information cookie. But the New Posts feature should take care of that.
PLEASE NOTIFY THE ADMINISTERRERRERR ABOUT ANY PROBLEMS!
2024 LOGIN/Posting ISSUES
Click if you have a problem.
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If you cannot Debauch because you get an IP blacklist error, try Debauching again time. It may work immediately, it may take a few attempts. It will work eventually, I don't think I had to click debauch more than three times. Someone is overzealous at our hosting company, but only on the first couple of attempts.
If you have problems logging in, posting, or doing anything else, please get in touch.
You know the email (if you don't, see in the registration info below), you know where to find the Administerrerrerr on the Midget Circus.
Some unpleasant miscreant was firing incessant database queries at our server, which forced the Legal Department of our hosting company, via their Abuse subdivision, to shut us down. No I have none.
All I can do it button the hatches, and tighten up a few things. Such as time limits on how long you may take to compose a post and hit Debauch! As of 24/01/10, I've set that at 30 minutes for now.
To restrict further overloads, any unregistered users had to be locked out.
How do we know who is or isn't an unregistered user?
By forcing anyone who wants in to Log In.
Is that annoying?
Yes. But there's only so much the Administerrerrerr can do to keep this place running.
Again, if you have any problems: get in touch.
REGISTRATION! NEW USERS!
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Rules For Female Passengers
-
dozer
- Hammer Time
- Location: umbc
- Contact:
"All you lazy bastards, you don't build no castles!"
-Jim Bishop.
-Jim Bishop.
Sisyphus wrote: If, on the other hand, a full-on revolution starts within one year, you will provide me your mailing address and I will send you the balsa wood box for you to eat. Provided I haven't already eaten it. In which case I will send you an object of equal or lesser value that hasn't been eaten, provided it is as edible as balsa and is of nearly equvalent volume (empty).
-
guitargeek
- Master Metric Necromancer
- Location: East Goatfuck, Oklahoma
- Contact:
Elitist, arrogant, intolerant, self-absorbed.
Midliferider wrote:Wish I could wipe this shit off my shoes but it's everywhere I walk. Dang.
Pattio wrote:Never forget, as you enjoy the high road of tolerance, that it is those of us doing the hard work of intolerance who make it possible for you to shine.
xtian wrote:Sticking feathers up your butt does not make you a chicken
-
Bigshankhank
- Fully Autonomous Cock-Puncher
- Location: Exiled to Living in a Van Down By The River
- Contact:
HAHA, its funny 'cause its true!! There was a couple last week down here that lost it on a gixxer 1k after hitting a couple bars (no pun intended), rider and female passenger are both dead, friends say the girl did not know the guy she was riding with.
So pay attention, be choosey who you ride with.
Or to put it another way, don't be a douchey squid with no respect for the road, your ride or your passenger.
So pay attention, be choosey who you ride with.
Or to put it another way, don't be a douchey squid with no respect for the road, your ride or your passenger.
It's time for Humankind to ditch the imaginary friends of our species' childhood and grow the fuck up.
-Davros
"Lasse mich deine Seele dem Herrscher der Finsternis opfern"
Let me sacrifice your soul to the ruler of darkness
Always carry a bottle of whiskey when you travel in case of a snakebite. Futhermore, always carry a small snake.
-Davros
"Lasse mich deine Seele dem Herrscher der Finsternis opfern"
Let me sacrifice your soul to the ruler of darkness
Always carry a bottle of whiskey when you travel in case of a snakebite. Futhermore, always carry a small snake.
-
goose
- Pâté de Foie Gras
- Location: Foggy Peninsula West of Oakland and South of Marin
BDB can drag a knee through the corner as a passenger and never upset the geometry of the bike. I wish I were half as good a passenger as she is. I guess I never had a passenger that did anything stupid on the back of my bike.... then again, I'm pretty damned selective as to who gets a ride from me. 'Cept that whole Jaeger thing.... I guess I was just smitten!
Drink triples til you're seeing double, feeling single, and looking for trouble! -Johnny Nitro, RIP
"British bikes of that era are made of a special alloy known as Brittainium. It is the only metal known to be able to rust even when fully submerged in oil. It also corrodes microscopic passages through itself whenever it makes contact with any known gasketing material." - AZ Rider
Re: Husaberg Build: "I pictured it more like the heroin addicted ex that keeps turning up, the bleeding you dry, breaking your heart, and crushing your soul, but you keep taking her back because it's the most fun ride you've ever had..." Bo-9
"British bikes of that era are made of a special alloy known as Brittainium. It is the only metal known to be able to rust even when fully submerged in oil. It also corrodes microscopic passages through itself whenever it makes contact with any known gasketing material." - AZ Rider
Re: Husaberg Build: "I pictured it more like the heroin addicted ex that keeps turning up, the bleeding you dry, breaking your heart, and crushing your soul, but you keep taking her back because it's the most fun ride you've ever had..." Bo-9
-
Jaeger
- Baron von Scrapple
- Location: NoVA
- Contact:
You bitch, you said I was the best you ever had!goose wrote:BDB can drag a knee through the corner as a passenger and never upset the geometry of the bike. I wish I were half as good a passenger as she is. I guess I never had a passenger that did anything stupid on the back of my bike.... then again, I'm pretty damned selective as to who gets a ride from me. 'Cept that whole Jaeger thing.... I guess I was just smitten!
--Jaeger
<<NON ERRO>>Bigshankhank wrote:The world is a fucking wreck, but there is still sunshine in some places. Go outside and look for it.
2018 Indian Scout -- "Lilah"
-
goose
- Pâté de Foie Gras
- Location: Foggy Peninsula West of Oakland and South of Marin
I always say that.... sheesh!Jaeger wrote:You bitch, you said I was the best you ever had!goose wrote:BDB can drag a knee through the corner as a passenger and never upset the geometry of the bike. I wish I were half as good a passenger as she is. I guess I never had a passenger that did anything stupid on the back of my bike.... then again, I'm pretty damned selective as to who gets a ride from me. 'Cept that whole Jaeger thing.... I guess I was just smitten!
--Jaeger
Drink triples til you're seeing double, feeling single, and looking for trouble! -Johnny Nitro, RIP
"British bikes of that era are made of a special alloy known as Brittainium. It is the only metal known to be able to rust even when fully submerged in oil. It also corrodes microscopic passages through itself whenever it makes contact with any known gasketing material." - AZ Rider
Re: Husaberg Build: "I pictured it more like the heroin addicted ex that keeps turning up, the bleeding you dry, breaking your heart, and crushing your soul, but you keep taking her back because it's the most fun ride you've ever had..." Bo-9
"British bikes of that era are made of a special alloy known as Brittainium. It is the only metal known to be able to rust even when fully submerged in oil. It also corrodes microscopic passages through itself whenever it makes contact with any known gasketing material." - AZ Rider
Re: Husaberg Build: "I pictured it more like the heroin addicted ex that keeps turning up, the bleeding you dry, breaking your heart, and crushing your soul, but you keep taking her back because it's the most fun ride you've ever had..." Bo-9
-
MoraleHazard
- Vatican Sex Kitten
- Location: Stamford, CT
Why would anyone not ride in March?"..... It's fugging March biotch. "
666(k) Retirement Plan of the Beast. Only offered by Dis Annuities.
____________
'91 EX500 (sold)
'04 R1150R
____________
It's like getting bitten by a radioactive horse and instead of getting a really large cock you turn into a brony.
____________
'91 EX500 (sold)
'04 R1150R
____________
It's like getting bitten by a radioactive horse and instead of getting a really large cock you turn into a brony.
-
dozer
- Hammer Time
- Location: umbc
- Contact:
Same reason the Mediterranean is full of yummy fish, squids hate cold weather
"All you lazy bastards, you don't build no castles!"
-Jim Bishop.
-Jim Bishop.
Sisyphus wrote: If, on the other hand, a full-on revolution starts within one year, you will provide me your mailing address and I will send you the balsa wood box for you to eat. Provided I haven't already eaten it. In which case I will send you an object of equal or lesser value that hasn't been eaten, provided it is as edible as balsa and is of nearly equvalent volume (empty).
-
MagnusTheBuilder
- Arbiter of Beard
- Location: Denver, CO
- Contact:
They should make passenger seats bigger, for the fatties:
-- The Mag
2003 Kawasaki Vulcan 1500 Classic
2017 Chevy Silverado
1970 Chevelle SS
1951 Chevy Custom
"He attacked everything in life with a mix of extraordinary genius and naive incompetence, and it was often difficult to tell which was which." --Douglas Adams
2003 Kawasaki Vulcan 1500 Classic
2017 Chevy Silverado
1970 Chevelle SS
1951 Chevy Custom
"He attacked everything in life with a mix of extraordinary genius and naive incompetence, and it was often difficult to tell which was which." --Douglas Adams
-
MagnusTheBuilder
- Arbiter of Beard
- Location: Denver, CO
- Contact:
What isn't puzzling about that picture?
Get fat without pads? Dangerous sugary diets...What the fuck are they talking about? Condensed food packets? Pure science fiction! (Easy Mac?)
Get fat without pads? Dangerous sugary diets...What the fuck are they talking about? Condensed food packets? Pure science fiction! (Easy Mac?)
-- The Mag
2003 Kawasaki Vulcan 1500 Classic
2017 Chevy Silverado
1970 Chevelle SS
1951 Chevy Custom
"He attacked everything in life with a mix of extraordinary genius and naive incompetence, and it was often difficult to tell which was which." --Douglas Adams
2003 Kawasaki Vulcan 1500 Classic
2017 Chevy Silverado
1970 Chevelle SS
1951 Chevy Custom
"He attacked everything in life with a mix of extraordinary genius and naive incompetence, and it was often difficult to tell which was which." --Douglas Adams
-
xtian
- Le coureur de lames chasse Tinti...
- Location: belgium
- Contact:
-
Vespalina
- Magnum Jihad
- Location: Philadelphia, PA
- Contact:
Re: Rules For Female Passengers
Just preparing for the Sledit...wanted to keep this bunch of tripe* for posterity.Sled wrote:Rules for female passengers on street bikes...
1. If you have no bike but just happen to have your own helmet in your car we know your playing us for a ride.
2. If your going to go for a ride go with the nicest bike he's the one who is least likely to crash and kill you. If he has a nice bike he's probably been ridding a while. If you go with a tool who has a 86 ninja 250 we are all going to laugh at you. Plus use your head if his bike looks broke then so is he DUHHH!
3. If the bike is a "Stunt bike" or rashed up all over reconsider there is a reason its rashed up.
4. If you're FAT! Save yourself some embarrassment and save us the aggravation of trying to tell you no with out saying cuz "YOU'RE FAT!!!! We can only be sooo nice. Use your head.
5. If your friend is ugly or FAT (See rule 4) it is not my responsibility to get someone to take her.
6. If you have on a skirt then YES!!! We have to go first. No one else knows how to get where we are going... (Right guys?)
7. Showing your nice boobies will get you selected first for a bike ride.
8. STOP!!!!! F***ing bashing your Pep-Boys helmet into the back of my $600 custom helmet... thank you!
9. Move back and stick your ass out... your squishing my nuts.
10. Stop scratching my tank with your fake J-Lo ring set.
11. Yes it is too possible to jerk me off while I'm riding my bike, rubbing gently works too... (Note: This will also ensure you another bike ride anytime)
12. It is customary to pay for motorcycle rides with oral sex. (NOTE: If your skills aren't up to par it is definitely ok to have a girlfriend of yours assist you. Team work is what it's all about.)
13. We know when a girl likes the bike and not us. If every time we call it's always the same **** can we go on the bike.... NO!!!!..... It's fugging March biotch.
14. Don't lean this bike, it has one driver and it's me. So sit there and relax.
15. No you're not going to "GO FLYING RIGHT OFF" (Unless you piss me off then it's a possibility.)
16. Yes I'm going to go fast... stop being a pu$$y.
17. Yes I just adjusted my mirrors to see your boobs.
18. When we stop at a gas station, you are not guarenteed a return trip. Know your role and maybe you get dropped off close to where you were found.
This IS a joke, right?
Now Xaos, get back in that kitchen and fix me a sammich...it's lunch time!
*no offense to tripe / no tripe was actually harmed as a result of this post
Hell on Wheels
-
Ames
- Megachiroptera Übermench
- Location: Denver, CO in MY OWN DAMN HOUSE!
- Contact:
-
MoraleHazard
- Vatican Sex Kitten
- Location: Stamford, CT
-
erosvamp
- Sophisticated Meat Machine
- Location: denver
-
UndertheGun
- Barista of Doom
- Location: Seattle/Olympia
- Contact:
-
Gauss
- Barista of Doom
- Location: Denver
- Contact:
-
sweetpea
- Maltov Rattlecan
- Location: Richmond
- Contact:
-
Priest
- Ancient Mariner
- Location: Frederick, Maryland
That's probably because you're a douchebag.Sled wrote:
I found it funny.
You see, man, the All manner of rude psychological abuse is welcome and encouraged portion of the description of The Grinder isn't intended to elicit such pedestrian hee-haws and crude guffaws like the material presented in the opening entry to this thread. That garbage isn't funny. The Grinder, and the UTMC itself, demands real humor and heartfelt, honest abuse. For example:
Sled, you are a cunt. I cannot believe how incredibly (and consistently) cunty you are. Your cuntery meets or exceeds any cuntery ever proposed or imagined previous to your cuntery. Your supermassive cuntery draws in lesser cunts with it's sheer gravity and absorbs them. A cunt of galactic proportion and scale, one so large, so deep, that millions of dollars worth of scientific instrumentation would need to be designed and employed to explore the entirety. A cunt immeasurable. Were one were to travel through time and space, one would still never see the extent and boundary of your cuntery. A quantum cunt.
See? Now that's funny.
Priest.
-
MagnusTheBuilder
- Arbiter of Beard
- Location: Denver, CO
- Contact:
+1Priest wrote: See? Now that's funny.
I presumed that Sled was obviously joking. It seems as though I have again extended too much credit.
-- The Mag
2003 Kawasaki Vulcan 1500 Classic
2017 Chevy Silverado
1970 Chevelle SS
1951 Chevy Custom
"He attacked everything in life with a mix of extraordinary genius and naive incompetence, and it was often difficult to tell which was which." --Douglas Adams
2003 Kawasaki Vulcan 1500 Classic
2017 Chevy Silverado
1970 Chevelle SS
1951 Chevy Custom
"He attacked everything in life with a mix of extraordinary genius and naive incompetence, and it was often difficult to tell which was which." --Douglas Adams
-
Vespalina
- Magnum Jihad
- Location: Philadelphia, PA
- Contact:
YEah, what he said!Priest wrote:That's probably because you're a douchebag.Sled wrote:
I found it funny.
You see, man, the All manner of rude psychological abuse is welcome and encouraged portion of the description of The Grinder isn't intended to elicit such pedestrian hee-haws and crude guffaws like the material presented in the opening entry to this thread. That garbage isn't funny. The Grinder, and the UTMC itself, demands real humor and heartfelt, honest abuse. For example:
Sled, you are a cunt. I cannot believe how incredibly (and consistently) cunty you are. Your cuntery meets or exceeds any cuntery ever proposed or imagined previous to your cuntery. Your supermassive cuntery draws in lesser cunts with it's sheer gravity and absorbs them. A cunt of galactic proportion and scale, one so large, so deep, that millions of dollars worth of scientific instrumentation would need to be designed and employed to explore the entirety. A cunt immeasurable. Were one were to travel through time and space, one would still never see the extent and boundary of your cuntery. A quantum cunt.
See? Now that's funny.
and you've got scurvy bitch!
Hell on Wheels
-
Priest
- Ancient Mariner
- Location: Frederick, Maryland
-
Priest
- Ancient Mariner
- Location: Frederick, Maryland
In defense of my essay, could not quantum be used to define a framework or foundation, as in quantum mechanics? Therefore, used as it is in my offering, could not "quantum cunt" be interpreted as the very root of cuntery, or the deepest level of such?Rev wrote:No prob. Everybody needs an editor sometimes.
Priest.
-
Rock
- Superfudge!
- Location: East Coast
- Contact:
