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Unintentional Hilarity

A forum for the off topic stuff. Everything from religion to philosophy to sex to humor (see why it used to be called Buggery?). All manner of rude psychological abuse is welcome and encouraged.
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Mk3
Captain Sensible, Space Command.
Location: The people's republic of Illinois Welcome comrade, join the party!

Unintentional Hilarity

Post by Mk3 » Tue Sep 18, 2012 6:32 pm

So I'm working on a volunteer project (which is seriously hampering my DOOM prep) and every year we repair a jacked up house for a different crippled old lady. This time, among other things, her door has been kicked in. I did some time as a finish carpenter in college, so I've put in doors from scratch, but haven't necessarily repaired them. So I went to the ultimate source of correct information....youtube. I came across this video, and you really just need to watch it to see why its funny. humor really gets moving around 2:01, but the set-up is good too.

sorry no can embed.

http://youtu.be/gNDHQmgoy5o" onclick="window.open(this.href);return false;


"...when someone asks you if you're a god, you say "YES "!

"UTMC, it's an international disorganization of racers, aficionados, mechanics, lunatics, and scumbags. It's like an online motorcycle Mos Eisley."

Zer0
Professor of Poop
Location: Smoggy Valley--east of Smog City

Re: Unintentional Hilarity

Post by Zer0 » Thu Sep 20, 2012 10:00 am

This guy is obviously an ex HS or college football player, keep hitting, meat. But I think even most football players would take notice of the open glass door right next to the front door.

But those rebar reinforcements are now on my home to do list.
'74 R90/6--Thor
'05 Sportster 1200--FrankenRat
My boy D when he was 4 wrote:Bones aren't important--we like motorcycles.
High Kommand wrote:That's the problem with giving a bike a girl's name. Too much temptation to lay it down to examine the undercarriage...

User avatar
DerGolgo
Zaphod's Zeitgeist
Location: Potato

Re: Unintentional Hilarity

Post by DerGolgo » Thu Sep 20, 2012 10:35 am

A solid door-frame, and a matching solid door, are of course a very good start. But they wanna get in, they'll still get in, perhaps not as easily, but using an axe or crowbar or the like.

Over here, if you wanna secure your door against being broken down, secure it well enough for the insurance company to be happy, this sort of thing tends to be top of the list:
Image

Mounted on a solid door, and walls, these things will withstand even battering rams and the like. Also all those other tricks like forcing the door off of it's hinges. Close as you are likely to get to a solid steel bar across your door. Fire department don't like 'em, I hear.
Red buttons are quick release to secure the door in a hurry, if you gotta. Can be unlocked from the outside. The cylinder is, of course, in that bar and not the door, so inaccessible to begin with, otherwise tamper protected, too.
If there were absolutely anything to be afraid of, don't you think I would have worn pants?

I said I have a big stick.

Mk3
Captain Sensible, Space Command.
Location: The people's republic of Illinois Welcome comrade, join the party!

Re: Unintentional Hilarity

Post by Mk3 » Thu Sep 20, 2012 5:59 pm

DG, over here we just shoot em. But since I'm already fixing a jamb, I looked for options. Besides, if I'm going to go medieval with the crossbar, I'd rather put in a draw bridge.
"...when someone asks you if you're a god, you say "YES "!

"UTMC, it's an international disorganization of racers, aficionados, mechanics, lunatics, and scumbags. It's like an online motorcycle Mos Eisley."

piccini9
Everybody dies. It's a love story.

Re: Unintentional Hilarity

Post by piccini9 » Thu Sep 20, 2012 6:09 pm

When I have a house of my own there will be a "water feature" you know, like a garden fountain kind of thing, six feet deep, ten feet across surrounding the whole house filled with fucking lava and alligators, fucking FIRE PROOF ALLIGATORS!
Or just a good solid deadbolt.
Adding pink and unicorns makes everything better.
-roadmissile

Treatment may include things like riding motorcycles and crocheting… whatever it takes to counteract the deleterious effects of existence. - Rolly

calamari kid
Ayatollah of Mayhem
Location: Lake Shitty

Re: Unintentional Hilarity

Post by calamari kid » Thu Sep 20, 2012 8:29 pm

If you don't do lavagators I'll be seriously disappointed.
"Go soothingly on the grease mud, as there lurks the skid demon." -Honda manual circa 1962

"Being shot out of a cannon will always be better than being squeezed out of a tube. That is why God made fast motorcycles, Bubba...." -Hunter S Thompson

"A psychotic is a guy who's just found out what's going on." -William S. Burroughs

Rabbit_Fighter
Keeper of the Lava
Location: Seattle (Wedgwood)

Re: Unintentional Hilarity

Post by Rabbit_Fighter » Thu Sep 20, 2012 8:47 pm

Loved it.

Reminded me of this classic:

http://youtu.be/4-yOqx-6G7Y" onclick="window.open(this.href);return false;
"no.
motorcycle the finality not is
motorcycle merely medium to achieve action of riding
motorcycle tool to bend space and time and overcome your own limitations as a mortal
riding more important than medium
spirit by object cannot be beaten."

piccini9
Everybody dies. It's a love story.

Re: Unintentional Hilarity

Post by piccini9 » Fri Sep 21, 2012 7:47 am

I think I got the fireproof alligators from Colbert.
Adding pink and unicorns makes everything better.
-roadmissile

Treatment may include things like riding motorcycles and crocheting… whatever it takes to counteract the deleterious effects of existence. - Rolly

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